Oh the joys of spring!!! CleAning out closets, draws, and mindsets…I thought oh shit am I ready for shorts tank tops and bikinis …with 16 days til spring and 83 til Memorial Day weekend, my perspective starts to shift yet again🤔 I start thinking about opening my windows switching out winter clothes for spring clothes and with that comes the thought of less clothing and the questions ….Did I do enough? 😳 enough exercising, enough of less eating the bad (but of so yummy) stuff, and did I do enough of clearing my mindset to be in a better place.
Honestly the answer is no…this past winter has been brutal on me, both mentally and physically, everyday life hit me with something else and each blow was worse than the last, it seemed all was lost cause every time I took two steps forward I got dragged back 5, for a moment ….a brief one I lost my shit😩🥊💔 and began to panic, and cry daily…not knowing what direction to go In or which way to turn, with no help insight and my only option was failure I freaked and shut down… than the universe last week we gave us a day that was 70 degrees in jersey aNd I knew it was a sign I thought what a great day for a run…but I haven’t run a long outdoor run in awhile I was gonna fail … deep inside I knew I had to go…so I turned to what I knew was best to help me as I began to fail…I choose fitness, I knew my fitness had taken a back seat to so many things going on around me, and I knew Fitness saved my life so many times so with the thought of beautiful weather I said …you know what fuck this…. it’s time for some spring cleaning mentally and physically!!!💪🏻💡👊🏻
In that moment I suddenly got tired of being a victim and looking out the window through a blurred lens..I was stepping out of fear and failure …being afraid to rock the boat at work and at home…I was tired!!!! That day I wound up running til I almost puked …the 9 mile run I took that day, changed my thought process from thinking I am a failure to thinking I must fail to succeed..instead of crying about what the universe is doing to me I thanked the universe for what it is teaching me…teaching me that true trials and tribulations bring the strongest successes and achievements, exercise is therapy and my companion in life and I abandoned it for the winter for one reason or another not realizing how important it is in my life😤🤔❤️
Knowing I haven’t ran the way I normally do, I haven’t lifted the way I normally do and my clothes don’t fit the way they use to and most importantly I neglected my self love process, Cause everything came crumbling down at once😩 that day when I decided to stop having a pity party for me I put my sneakers on and threw out all my excuses, and my blame and all my defeats…in the gym and out, I just was running in that moment …and when I hit mile 9 at 1:34 I knew I would be ok as all was not lost and I still had hope, and faith on the course and off…cause I still had belief in myself..and as the hits kept and keep coming at me today(the worst was this morning) I know I can do this, I know that if these situation don’t help me grow they will help me to die in the sense!!! 🤔🤔 and today I choose to live, lifting my limitations and showing myself I got me…today try doing some spring cleaning and believing…
And letting go of people, Places and things that serve no purpose, listening to my favorite songs that motivate me on volume 10000 is what I need to do… and while I reshape my failures into success, reach than surpass my goals ..my way….. I know people will think I’m crazy or I lost my mind, or something is wrong with me…but I’m tired…tired of worrying about how others perceive or receive me…. tired of covering up my scars and wounds for the sake of another… tired of not rocking the boat while so many are shaking the shit out of it!!!😤 Today I start my spring cleaning both mentally and physically, and as I wear my short shorts stare away… and as I sprint down the course of life stare away and judge if you must…cause as I continue to transform my outer shell and my muscles grow and my booty pops 🍑 and you begin to judge my outer shell know the bigger transformation is happening internally🙏🏻 as I am tired of defeat and will feast on success💪🏻 today I invite you to lift all limiting beliefs with me and Spring into Action with me!!! Today I am cleaning out my closet!!!! See you on the mat🙏🏻